Has anyone actually survived their daughter's engagement and wedding prep?
We are like two weeks into this, and I already want to drown my sorrows in one of my famous Wisconsin old fashioneds or five or possibly just float out to sea on an ice floe. Right now it's neck and neck between whether my wife or daughter will have a nervous breakdown first. Neither are talking to each other. June cannot come soon enough.
37 Replies
11mo
(In response to this post by ColoVT82)
11mo
Since my son moved to Wisconsin (to follow his GF who is a vet student of UW in Madison...they will marry AFTER she graduates and she has a nice job to match his Mechanical Engineering job because that's what responsible adults do), I've been turned on to the Wisconsin brandy old fashioned, which has been my Friday afternoon companion through all this.
(In response to this post by ColoVT82)
11mo
I didn't do that and between her and my spouse, Jeebus it got expensive. She was divorced 7 years later. What a waste of money.
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
11mo
DOBW just graduated as well as her beau. She's at home and he's in DC starting his new job. Every time he visits I expect something but it never comes. I just wish they'd get it done with at this point.
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
11mo
I told her the amount, and gave it to her. I told her if she spent less, she could keep the balance. But if she went over, she had to pay.
From experience, she knew I was not kidding. She went a little over, but not too bad. And she paid it!
(In response to this post by astrohokie)
11mo
One in Montana, one local in our hometown. Totally different approaches by our daughters. One wanted to do her own planning and one wanted the parents totally involved.
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
7
7Hokie1
11mo
checks.Told my daughters I would only pay for 1 wedding each. One got divorced & remarried, didn't pay for it, other daughter still on 1st marriage.
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
11mo
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
11mo
I'd say we had about two good years between the age of 12 and 22. I can't wait to someday be as smart as a teenage girl
(In response to this post by reestuart)
11mo
great. She is not a pushover. She also has personality to burn. On the other hand. Damn. I've never felt so dumb.
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
11mo
school years were something.
(In response to this post by reestuart)
11mo
My wife was pretty hard on her growing up. Some was good, some was bad. She did tell my wife recently that she appreciated the fact that we stand up for ourselves and set a good example in that way, but I'm afraid she has too much of that in her. Her poor fiancee is going to learn some hard lessons.
(In response to this post by reestuart)
11mo
Crazy meddling ex wife was a tinderbox. I finally lit the match and went off. Things got better after that.
Good luck with your toast! Hard to let your little girl go.
** Edited by Spudnut at 9/4/2025, 7:51:13 AM
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
11mo
My daughter turned 13 back in May. She is still SUPER sweet - almost abnormally so for her age - so I am trying to cherish every day while that lasts. She definitely has flashes of teen attitude, most often when she is tired, but for the most part we aren't in the thick of it yet. I can tell a part of her is ready to grow up, while part of her still enjoys being a kid. When it's just us as a family, she is super affectionate and sweet, but when we go out in public, a switch definitely gets flipped and we get more of a cold shoulder. That's fine, and expected, so it doesn't bother me. What's really going to be difficult to cope with, though, is when that switch gets permanently flipped and she doesn't want anything to do with us even at home. I know it's coming, and I dread it.
As you said, it's hard to let my little girl go...
(In response to this post by Spudnut)
11mo
that never goes away. And once you let them fly away, they realize just how important you were and are.
(In response to this post by MP4VT2004)
11mo
and was lucky that my wife and daughter had almost no conflicts. But I can see how it does cause issues.
Amazing how our materialistic culture sometimes takes something so joyous and almost ruins it.
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
11mo
(In response to this post by BleedinOandM)
11mo
But we are also not just an endless bank, and we do have the hindsight of 33 years of marriage and have seen many marriages thrive and fail
(In response to this post by vthokieq)
11mo
And for the record...I wasn't talking about you specifically. But I've seen too many parents make it a social event for them. Bride and groom end up not even knowing a bunch of people there.
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
11mo
And that was even after my MIL insisted we invite several of her family members (which in retrospect we were glad because guess what, you don't know everything in your 20s). This one will be bigger but not outrageous. We have friends with 200+ guests at their kids' weddings. Ridiculous.
(In response to this post by vthokieq)
11mo
I think it's called Father of the Bride.
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
11mo
She makes the irrational daughter look serene
(In response to this post by Coach McGuirk)
11mo
** Edited by Stork at 9/4/2025, 6:25:59 AM
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
11mo
Plus, you don't get to enjoy the look of sheer bewilderment on the grooms face any longer. That should be your happy place.
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
E
EDGEMAN
11mo
(In response to this post by Happy Dog)
11mo
I'd give her twice the money if she waited a year and eloped. I'm waiting to see how she and the groom are getting married in June, somehow securing paid clinical internships in the mental health field in a different state at the same time, coming up with a lease, deposit, and first month's rent with no jobs.......
(In response to this post by EDGEMAN)